Today was one of those mornings where I woke up with immediate thoughts of inadequacy, of shame, and I felt swamped with weakness. I felt suffocated by pressure, consumed by thoughts that I knew were straight from the enemy, but nevertheless had an effect on me. I thought to myself, “You could’ve done this better. You should’ve treated this person kinder. You should’ve said this. You should not have said that. “
Yes, it was one of those mornings where I kind of wanted to stay in bed all day and sleep until it was over, but then as I was simultaneously mumbling prayers to get over it and snoozing my alarm clock, I felt the call of the Holy Spirit reminding me of these words, “Wake up, sleeper, rise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you. (Ephesians 5:14)”
So, after ten minutes of debating, I decided to stand up and went to wash my face and brush my teeth. Then, as I approached the mirror, I looked to my right and saw these words hanging up on the wall, “My thoughts about you are not your thoughts about you. Those who seek my face are radiant and their faces are never covered in shame. Beloved, there is nothing inside you I cannot reconcile that I can’t find. Do not run from my voice choosing you. I will call you by a new name. Disregard the voices that call you anything other than pure and holy. “
They are words that God spoke to my friend a few months ago in my living room, and words that he spoke straight into my heart this morning.Praise God for this promise, that those who seek him are radiant and he makes his face shine upon them, leaving no room for the shadows of shame.Praise God that I got out of my bed, (… partially motivated by coffee and avocado toast) woke up, and walked forward, because now my face is beaming with the love of Jesus, and my mind is renewing itself in his love.
Do not let the funk keep you down today. Do not sleep with fear or allow its presence to linger, but look to Jesus and let his light shine upon you.