Have you ever asked your man to go shopping at the mall and received an enthusiastic YES? Me neither. When it comes our Man’s fashion, most push away our opinions, hoping to keep hold of what wardrobe pride they have. When they DO agree, our enthusiasm only scares them off for the next six months. Is there a happy medium? Maybe we’re too set on dressing our own Ken Doll, then allowing our man to take control of the shopping reins. To make shopping a more pleasant experience for you and your man, I have a few tips that will leave both of you with positive memories rather than resentment in the dressing room.
Don’t criticize more than you compliment. This many go without saying, but no one wants to be told everything they do wrong followed by more things they do wrong. Whether at home or in the dressing room, share your opinions with the 2:1 ratio. For every one constructive criticism you give, find two things to compliment your man on. “I really love how you incorporate sweaters into your wardrobe and love the shoes you have, but maybe different color pants could accentuate that better.” Those that feel built up and encouraged tend to follow suggestions more when they think it’s coming from a positive place. This not only gains their trust but shows that you’re working for the good of your Man’s wardrobe rather than your own motives.
Don’t get bossy. No one likes a back seat driver, especially when it comes to choosing a wardrobe. For most, one’s wardrobe is a reflection of who they are as a person. When you take control of the process, you strip your man of their freedom to express who they are. You may not like that torn band t-shirt that he wears, but is it really worth ripping away from him, just because you don’t like it? Give your man some autonomy about who he wants to be and dress. You may think you’re helping, when really you’re insulting him. Let him dress himself, and allow opinions to follow when asked. This way, he’ll ask your opinion when it’s really valued, and you’ll be able to kiss your back seat driving days good-bye.
Don’t make them your personal Ken doll. This is my personal struggle when it comes to my husband’s wardrobe and getting carried away with playing dress up. I LOVE fashion and tend to get WAY to excited when my husband even hints towards wanting my help with outfit choices. Unfortunately, your man is a real person, and that doesn’t call for playing dress up. That doesn’t mean you can’t have some fun? Just remember that you’re shopping for him, not you! Don’t take offense to “No.” Just because you long for your man to rock that Justin Bieber look, doesn’t mean oversized t-shirts and skinny jeans are for him. Your man will appreciate you helping him because you know him so well! Why else would he have asked you? Foster a positive experience so that your man not only feels thankful he has someone who knows him so well, but also someone who respects his style.
Your man may never be enthusiastic to go shopping with you, but that doesn’t mean you can’t create an experience he’ll leave coming back for more. When it comes to creating a wardrobe, not all men consider themselves confident, but it doesn’t mean that you can’t help them find who they really are through guiding their outfit options. When you choose compliments over criticism, steering clear of back seat driver tendencies, and let them be who they really are, you’ll feel confident shopping for your man only brings your closer together.